first I want to start up with a appolegy for my long silence, I guess I just didn’t have anything to say for quite a wile.
well where I want to talk about now is something that has been going on forever for me. its what happens when things-good or bad- just get to much for me. I can best describe it as noise in my head, thoughts and feelings don’t make sense anymore because its all so much and then I just want to get away but can’t because how does one get away from your own head?
when I was younger I use to cry when it got to much and to confusing, so it was and is good possible that I started crying in the middle of a party or something else fun. it was just that I didn’t know what to do anymore and the crying was just relieving some of the pressure.
at parties and events where much people are or a lot is going on I have learned to take a break before it gets to much so that I don’t spoil the event for others and myself. but not always I can get out and then my head fills until I just want to scream because its just all noise in my head.