every-single-time someone tells me something like: cheer up or give us a smile, I get annoyed same goes with just let it go and don’t let it get to you. I get annoyed because those phrases give the impression that being sad and getting hurt is a choice but who would choose to feel bad ?
when people say this they mean it well, I know that and that is why I am saying here and now: its not helping, it can even make me feel worse. the suggestion that one can simply choose to feel better is not much better then saying that its ones own fault that you feel bad in the first place.
bad days happen, one can feel like shit for no particular reason and that isn’t under once control. my hero Stephen Fry explained this briljantly with the weather matafor for once emotions: “It’s real. You can’t change it by wishing it away. If it’s dark and rainy it really is dark and rainy and you can’t alter it”
it someone says something hurtful then one gets hurt, how much one gets hurt is something personal. it has to do with once personality and experiences or a combination of those can make one more sensitive to a specific comment or just make one generally sensitive. maybe you are a person that isn’t all that sensitive, you just take a deep breath and put it behind you, good for you, really but that doesn’t mean that everyone is like that, not for everyone its all that simple.
before this post you didn’t know any better, you thought you where being helpful and you intentions where good (I value a lot on good intentions) but now you do and I trust that you will act on this and never suggest again that feeling well is just a question of attitude.